Why Blog Now?

Why blog now?

Blogging has been around for years. I've been around for years. Why did I start blogging two days ago? The short answer is this:

5:00pm - 7:00pm

It's the time of day when I'm waiting for things or people to happen.  Waiting for the boys to come home, waiting for dinner, waiting for the meeting to start, waiting for time to pass.   I don't like it - the passivity of it -- waiting on someone else to get my evening moving.  Remember how active I am?  I can literally roam around the house with no focus during these hours.  Wierd, but it's been happening for years.

So what to do between 5:00 and 7:00 - and I'll be honest here, sometimes it's between 4:00 and 8:00?  Drink wine?  Eat snacks?  Watch Oprah?  Take long walks by myself?  Write?

I decided (after trying many of the other options first) to write.  Up I went to my beautiful room, to my desk and my yellow legal pad and lovely pens and well, fell asleep just thinking about journaling.  It has always felt so useless to me.  And when I re-read what I have been able to  force to paper over the years  -- eeks -- what was I thinking?  Really, it just means nothing to read it. 

I write other stuff, too.  Short stories, essays, poems, letters.  But I never attempt to publish, because I never perfect.  My tenses are always wrong.  I split infinitives.  I use "there" when I mean to use "their" -- how embarrasing is that?  But, if you've stuck with me, remember how I don't care how I look on the tennis court or on a long run? 

Those of you who read the Washington Post may be familiar with an advise column by Carolyn Hax called "Tell Me About It."  I love this column (actually, I love all question/answer columns no matter the topic).  In one series of questions a reader asks:

People always say you have to make yourself happy.  What goes into that?  How does one make oneself happy?

(Aren't you glad you're not an advice columnist right about now?)

Carolyn responds:

Figure out the things that make you feel confident/fulfilled/energized; that give you a sense of purpose or accomplishment; that tap into your natural ablilities and strengths and that don't put you at the mercy of any one person, and orient your life around those.

Wow - that set me back a step or two.  Especially the "...that don't put you at the mercy of any one person...." 

So writing does that for me - it energizes me and gives me a sense of purpose, and I think that it taps into some natural gifts that I have been given.  AND it keeps me from the mercy of my dear family, who are building their own beautiful lives while I am cooking dinner for them.  Sharing what I have written gives me the first part - confidence.  Spelling, verb tenses, participial phrases - they won't hold me back anymore (although I'll be looking things up)!

So on I go, how about you? Fill-in-the-blanks below:

_____________ make me feel confident/fulfilled/energized

_____________ give me a sense of purpose or accomplishment

_____________ tap into my natural abilities and strengths (w/out putting me at the mercy of another person)

Participate....run your OWN race!!